Who Am I?

Front PageNobody really. I am just the average wife, saint, employee, and Mom! I do, however, have a near perfect husband who encouraged me to begin this blog … quite sometime ago.

I began a natural hair journey several years ago. I failed, began again, and have been natural for over a year. In this time, I’ve noticed a lack of natural Pentecostal women online. I see them at conferences, in my local church, but we are missing on the Web!

There. I said it. I’m not sure it is not politically correct…but I do know that it’s true. I’ve spent too much time looking for you! Come out of hiding (I will too) and  let down that Apostolic Afro!

Never.

I have big plans for 2018. Then, I had one phone call on December 29, 2017 at 9:08 AM, that made me think, “I will never.” At no time in the future or present, on no occasion, not ever, at no time, not at any time, not once, NOT. AT. ALL. Have you ever had those moments? When you’ve thought, “I will never ______ (fill in the blank).” Sounds like my morning.

I’ve seen several blog posts about the new year and setting goals. I told myself, I should do that, but what goals can you set for hair?  Who would have thought that the word never would inspire me for this blog post?

I’ve set many goals, but none for my hair. I have however thought many “I will never statements and exclamations when it comes to hair. Goodness, I just made one on Christmas Eve. I asked my mother-in-law, who has been natural for four years, did she have any relaxed hair left. She replied, “Yes.”

I’m not sure that I heard much after that yes. I thought, I will never be rid of this relaxed hair. Quite the contradiction to my Forever is a long time post. However, discouragement can hit you at any moment. My husband just said in a lesson he taught that “If the enemy can attack your self-confidence, he is golden.”

Don’t let these last few days 2017 give in to discouragement in your hair journey, where ever that may be. I have created some new mantra for the new year.

“I will never give up.”

-Melinda Davis

There are so many goals we have written, unwritten, spoken, and unspoken. Truth be told, we probably have two or three goals from years past that we can recycle into the new year. But promise yourself one thing …

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Check out this FREE printable to remind you throughout the year!

Can’t Dutch this! : 2 for 1

I finally learned how to Dutch braid! I’m so excited to add more variety in my styling. I’ve been wearing flat twists for some time, it’s about time I changed it up a bit. From a distance, it looks exactly the same, but get close up and BAM, you’ve got this cute number:

Dutch Braid

I wore this for Thanksgiving this year on freshly washed hair. I find that it last longer than flat twist for some reason. I will admit this braid gets a little wonky in the back, it is a work in progress! The trick to dutch braiding is to remember that you are going UNDER with each strand of hair. The YouTube video that helped me master (master may be a stretch) this is found here:

Kharissa Rae also has a video on braided styles on straight hair, which brings me to the two of the “2 for 1”, I straightened my hair for Christmas!
Flat Iron
This is NOT a pose, I was just holding down the left side because it tends to go rogue sometimes all the time!

I love the eighth style! Check it out here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHrgIl8VAnc

Beware, these styles are bound to warrant unwanted touching, simply let them know:
Dutch

 

Pen·te·cos·tal Prod·uct Re-view

Everytime I pulled out Carol’s Daughter Monoi Repairing Split End Sealer, I got angry. Muttering under my breath, “Stupid, expensive stuff!” Which would quickly ensue an, “Oooooo, that’s a bad word!” Amazing how kids hear whispers clearly, but not the yell directing them to stop fighting (insert eye roll).

Even though I believed the product was overpriced, I couldn’t get over the promise “93.5% fewer split ends instantly!”

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At the time, I paid $17.99 for it, had a coupon for 20% off, purchase with Ebates to get 1% back, and had it delivered to the store to avoid shipping cost. Yes, I’m cheap.

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I now use it faithfully. It’s become an Apostolic Afro Staple. After moisturizing my hair with Pink Oil Moisturizer and Shea Butter, I add Carol’s Daughter Split End Sealer to my ends.

Now, I have 30 years worth of split ends. Technically, it’s more than that, but if I told you how many years, you would know how old I really am and be like “Oh my goodness, you’re so oollldddd!” Then I’d be sad and try to cheer myself up by saying, “Well {insert age} is the new 20.”

So what if I rounded down … STOP judging me! Whew! …. what was I talking about again??

Oh! Now I have 25 years of split ends 🙂 so I wasn’t expecting instant, visible results. What I love about this product is that it binds my ends together and makes my hair smooth and soft.

Before-After

I was in the process of starting this blog when I purchased this product. It took me a while to post about it because I wasn’t sure if this would be something I will purchase again and again.

I will tell you, I am on the market for a less expensive option, but I saw that is was on sale at http://www.jcp.com here for $15! Also, if you enter 49GIFTS at checkout, you’ll save an additional 25% and don’t forget to earn cash back for online purchases with Ebates!

For more information on how the product works, visit their site here.

 

Waging War Against Split Ends: Attack by Stratagem

The best books have the biggest words. Who uses strategem?! Sun Tzo does. For those of you who are like me, I googled it so you don’t have to. It means a plan or scheme, especially one used to outwit an opponent or achieve an end. Let’s outwit split ends.

I’m pretty sure a conversation between Sun Tzo and I would  result in a lot of blank stares. He was dead serious about war. See what I did there? Pun intended. He said, ” In the practical art of war, the best thing of all is to take the enemy’s country whole and intact; to shatter and destroy it is not so good. It is better to recapture an army entire than to destroy it.”

I’m pretty sure he said, “Don’t cut your hair.” As I write it, it seems a bit of a stretch, but seriously I see it. Do you? I don’t believe shattering and destroying your glory is not the way to save it. Are split ends annoying? Yes. But, I believe you can have a beautiful, growing mane of hair without “shattering and destroying.”

Hair is composed of three layers. The innermost layer is the medulla, then the cortex, and finally the cuticle. The cortex is created with proteins called keratin, that gives your hair it’s strength and texture, while the cuticle is dead cells overlapping each other. All the research I’ve done thus far, states, “The only thing that will get rid of split ends is a hair cut.” Dead hair. We are going to need a miracle! That’s okay though, I know a guy…

We have a saying at our church, “We pray about everything, because God can do anything.” I was told by a fellow saint and woman with natural hair when I first began my journey to pray about my hair. This is not just any woman, it is one whose hair has gone tail-bone length. It was her number one piece of advice. We didn’t talk about products, protective styling, nor hair tools, just prayer.

Prayer

“If he is secure at all points, be prepared for him. If he is superior in strength, evade him. If he is secure at all points, be prepared for him…

The general who loses a battle makes but few calculations beforehand. Thus do many calculations lead to victory  and few calculations to defeat: how much more no calculations at all! It is by attention to this point that I can foresee who is likely to win or lose.” -Sun Tzo

Preparation is Key
We have to prepare and plan for the split-end attack. I am so dramatic…I knooow, Mom you are right :)! There are a few things we can do to avoid future split-ends and damage from them.

1. Use a wide-tooth comb.
2. Use heat sparingly.
3. Treat your hair gently. #treatyoself
4. Increase your protein intake/products.

Although ironic, I will re-quote from earlier in this post, “The only thing that will get rid of split ends is a hair cut,” but I will leave you with this thought from the man who created online audio streaming,

“No one changed the world or an industry by doing what everybody else is doing.”

-Mark Cuban

Check out the first post in this series here!

You’re doing better than you think.

We all have those days when we look in the mirror, not really feeling what you see. Well, Monday was one of those days for me. I put my apostolic afro staples in my hair and put my old faithful style of flat twist. Seriously, it’s my go to style. I part my hair differently to pretend it’s a different style, but it’s all just the same ole’ flat twists.

Same Style

I stopped by Food Lion to pick up a few things when I ran into my husband’s aunt … my aunt-in-law, is that a thing? She said, “Woooowwww, your hair! It is …” I didn’t even let her finish, I had received this comment so much. “I know, it’s thick,” cringing inside. Surprisingly she replied with a “No, well yes it’s thick, but its beautiful!” What do you use on your hair?” “I…I…I…”

Better

Yeah…I could barely even speak because I was in shock. I thought it was yet another comment about how think my hair was and a little taken back that this wasn’t the case. But we started talking and exchanged a few products that worked for me! Just to make sure I got the message, my neighbor complimented me on my hair the same day and the next morning, this handsome boy said,

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“I like your hair Mommy.”

“Help me to see me, the way You see me”

Flat twists changed my life. They can be dressed up, down, anyway you want. Do yourself a favor and check out this video. This is the very first video I watched about flat twist back when I was still relaxing my hair … I remember because it was just that monumental!

If you master the art of the flat twist, you can achieve any of these looks on Pinterest!

Flat Twist Collage

 

From me to you, “Woooowwwww, your hair is beautiful!”